Communication Defined

Learning the definitions of words is important because it gives you a broader understanding of the context of that word. Definitions allow you to reflect on the building blocks of a word’s meaning and see how each of them applies to your situation. This is why we are starting with Communication Defined. There are many building blocks of the word communication for you to understand so you can truly know what we are talking about in this course. 

You’re about to be blown away by just how complex Effective Communication is and truly understand why so many people get it so wrong.

Communication is defined as an exchange between people of information involving the organization of and sending of symbols. It can be verbal or nonverbal, written or spoken, one-way or two-way. All communication includes a:

1. Sender – the person or group that originates the message to be transmitted.
2. Encoding – process by the sender of turning thoughts/ideas into communication. 
3. Message – the information transmitted, ideally simple, clear, and concise.
4. Medium – the form in which the message is transmitted: voice, written word, nonverbal actions, phone, electronic.
5. Receiver – the person or group that hears or takes in the message.
6. Decoding – the process by the receiver to understand and interpret the message.
7. Feedback – how the receiver responds and provides information back to the sender.

The Sender of a message may not accurately or effectively communicate what he or she intends (encoding) or the receiver may attach meanings that were not intended (decoding) resulting in what is referred to as miscommunication. Then surrounding the entire communication process is interference, which consists of the entire situation of when, how, what, where the message was received. 

Let’s pause for a minute and think about what you just took in. We said communication was much more complex than people realize and it’s no wonder there is so much room for it to go very wrong. Here’s an illustration to see the process in action:

“Communication is the responsibility of the sender, not the receiver. Period.” – Jen Butler, MEd

In the above example, there is a lot going on during the interference phases that turns a simple ask into a full-blown argument. These kinds of situations happen constantly throughout people’s day because they are unaware of the complexity of communication and what is really happening.

Not you though, keep going. 🙂 

Basic Principles of Effective Communication

Communication is so well studied there is an entire field dedicated to it. Out of the mounds of research, scholars have identified three basic principles of Effective Communication they all agree upon: Communication is inevitable, irreversible, and unrepeatable.

Inevitable – Whether you intend to or not, you are always communicating. Your silence in a crowded room communicates. You continuously raising your hand in class communicates. Your use of your directional while driving communicates. Your smile, eyes, eyebrows, lip movement, or slight twitch communicates. 

Much of our communication is automatic. We are unaware of when or how it happens or the attitude we convey. So, whether we are sitting quietly, speaking to a group, or listening to someone else, we are sending, receiving, and sending back information that influences communication.

Non-verbal communication is a major culprit for creating tension and conflict within this principle. You’ve had times when someone is talking to you and then suddenly say, “What was that eye-roll for?” You argue you didn’t eye-roll and were listening very intently, etc. We don’t need to describe it any further. You know what happens in this scenario cuz’ we have all been there. 

 Irreversible – You cannot undo a message that is communicated, regardless of the medium or the message. You can alter the next message, but you cannot undo the previous. Emails or texts are a great example of this. Once you send a message it’s out there. There’s no technology that allows us to take that email or text back from the intended reader. It is in their phone or inbox waiting to be read and decoded.

This is also the same with verbal and non-verbal communication. Once a message is conveyed, you cannot take it back or magically erase it, regardless of how many, “I’m sorry,” or “That’s not what I meant,” statements that follow. Once the decoding process begins by the receiver there are connections made within their brain that solidifies the message into their neurons. A bunch of other brain functions happen that propels the receiver to have an emotional response and communicate back. They filter their message through their own filters (interpretations, assumptions, experiences, culture, limited beliefs) and world-view lens before they respond. And the communication then goes round and round.

Unrepeatable – Once said, something cannot be repeated the exact way twice. Your tone, emphasis, phrasing, subtle body language, etc. are too nuanced to be said again identically to the way you communicated it the first time. This principle is especially important when it comes to making impressions early in a communication with someone. 

Take a job interview or a first date for example. How you answer questions the first time will determine how the relationship moves forward. But, if you make a statement and receive feedback from the receiver that indicates your response was inappropriate you may try and restate it again to make up for your faux pas. No matter how you try and correct things, the first statement continues to be interference in the communication.

We’ve established terms and essential building blocks of communication. Now let’s unpack the cost of misunderstandings.